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By Kim Brooks On a recent evening, I was having drinks with a male friend — a single and actively-looking-for-a-long-term-relationship friend — when he asked me why there seemed to be so many married women on Tinder. Did they just want to flirt? My husband and I met at a party on a quiet street in a college town. More women were beginning to see opening their marriages as a legitimate and in many ways appealing option. I wondered if Tinder, which brought the world of dating within finger-tap distance, was accelerating the shift? It seemed common knowledge that apps like Tinder had transformed single life and dating.

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It reminded me of how tipsy I got from the first beer I drank after nine months of pregnancy abstention. I settled on, simply, Married woman.

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We shared a house, political viewpoints, the responsibility of raising two small. May I belong to you? About a third of the couples had a more attractive wife, a third a more attractive husband and the remaining partners showed matching looks. The reason, researchers suspect, is that men place great value on beautywhereas women are more interested in having a supportive husband.

Were they transforming marriage as well? Trash like this breeds misery. Keep going.

Stop fishing in ponds and then wondering why you never encounter a fellow shark. For our lookkng, we bought each other things like electric blankets and warm wool socks and a Vitamix blender for making soup.

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